would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
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