If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
Randomize