you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
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