So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
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