I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
He passed out mid-signature
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
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