Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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