At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
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We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
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We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
God I need to hump something, right now.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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