just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
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