Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize