my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize