He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
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