Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
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