i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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