Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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