Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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