just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
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