haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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