dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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