please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize