sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Randomize