he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
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I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
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Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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