worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
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