she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
I would fuck him just for his dog
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