if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
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i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
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Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
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