meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize