Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
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