1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
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