Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
Randomize