Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
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