I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
he just fucked me for my cheese..
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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