omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
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