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Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
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