Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize