i need an iv and a liver transplant
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize