We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Randomize