Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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