if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
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