Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
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