So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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