Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
Randomize