Texts From Last Night

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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink

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  (609): apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink http://tfl.nu/9o16
  Replies (37) Good night (972) Bad night (2392) Order T-Shirt
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  (913): View more from Kansas

  id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"

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  (913): id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!" http://tfl.nu/e9j9
  Replies (5) Good night (2256) Bad night (437) Order T-Shirt
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  (501): View more from Arkansas

  fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.

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  (501): fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka. http://tfl.nu/5hpm
  Replies (44) Good night (3565) Bad night (453) Order T-Shirt
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  (818): View more from California

  my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you

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  (818): my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you http://tfl.nu/x2i9
  Replies (30) Good night (5786) Bad night (814) Order T-Shirt
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  (917): View more from New York City

  you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys

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  (917): you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys http://tfl.nu/x3sf
  Replies (17) Good night (3265) Bad night (1067) Order T-Shirt
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  (281): View more from Texas

  He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.

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  (281): He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back. http://tfl.nu/ko52
  Replies (13) Good night (5774) Bad night (823)
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  (347): View more from New York

  CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS

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  (347): CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS http://tfl.nu/kzom
  Replies (27) Good night (3851) Bad night (1243) Order T-Shirt
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.

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  (404): My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck. http://tfl.nu/0ivr
  Replies (11) Good night (4571) Bad night (1134) Order T-Shirt
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon

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  (403): well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon http://tfl.nu/7c63
  Replies (6) Good night (3386) Bad night (872) Order T-Shirt
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.

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  (570): My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide. http://tfl.nu/y8jz
  Replies (6) Good night (2475) Bad night (939)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese

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  (215): she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese http://tfl.nu/9mra
  Replies (6) Good night (687) Bad night (1650) Order T-Shirt
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now

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  (617): So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now http://tfl.nu/xd86
  Replies (3) Good night (1962) Bad night (496) Order T-Shirt
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  (909): View more from California

  Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?

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  (909): Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs? http://tfl.nu/7n3l
  Replies (8) Good night (1501) Bad night (484) Order T-Shirt
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  (516): View more from New York

  My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.

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  (516): My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit. http://tfl.nu/2g7d
  Replies (9) Good night (861) Bad night (1676) Order T-Shirt
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  (706): View more from Georgia

  I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.

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  (706): I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever. http://tfl.nu/oprl
  Replies (4) Good night (1195) Bad night (255) Order T-Shirt

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