Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
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