The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
We got so high we made milksteak
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
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