Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
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