Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
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