We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
She's the barista slut.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
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Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
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Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
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