Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize