This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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