I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
Small penises have feelings too.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Randomize