She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
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